Speed vs.spirituality:A relative newbies's perspective
One of my previous rabbis, ordained at the Conservative Movement's JTS but also the graduate of an Orthodox pre-college yeshivah, once complained that, for most Conservative Jews, attending synagogue was almost their only form of Jewish observance, whereas Orthodox Jews and more-observant Conservative Jews practiced Judaism as a regular part of their daily lives, not only in shul but also at home and elsewhere. He had a point, judging by my experience. Sure, we non-Orthos light Chanukah candles and attend a seder or two on Pesach, but seriously, how many non-Orthodox Jews do you know who integrate Jewish practice so thoroughly into their daily lives that they recite a b'rachah/blessing before eating a snack?
And what does this have to do with speed or spirituality? Consider the usual manner of reciting Birkat HaMazon/Grace After Meals. Judging by my own experience, the question of whether, on occasions when one is not restricted by severe time limitations, one speeds through Birkat HaMazon, reciting only the zimun ("invitation") aloud, or whether one does Birkat HaMazon b'tzibbur (as a community, aloud) seems, sometimes, to depend on whether one is Orthodox (or Orthodox-educated) or non. I've seen both Orthos and ex-Orthos speed-davven/pray their way through Birkat HaMazon. I've rarely seen non-Orthos who were not Ortho-educated do likewise.
The same is true of davvening/praying. I can understand why the pace of prayer at a "commuter" minyan is roughly 90 miles per hour--many of the attendees really do have to catch a train/bus or try to beat the rush-hour traffic to get to work on time. What I can't understand is why there's sometimes a big hurry to finish the service quickly even when people don't have to rush to work. Yes, there are considerations regarding spending time with the family, but still, can't we stop and smell the roses, or at least slow down a little, if only out of respect for Shabbat (Sabbath) or Yom Tov (holiday), or for a special occasion?
Again, it seems to me that there's an Ortho/non-Ortho divide on speed-davvening on Shabbat or Yom Tov. (There's also a push-back against speed-davvening among those Orthodox who pray with "Carlebach minyanim.")
My best guess is that speedy davvening is a product of familiarity and consistent observance. Those for whom daily davvening, bentching (saying Birkat HaMazon), and observance of the mitzvot/commandments are standard operating procedure seem, from my perspective as a relative newcomer to Jewish prayer, to take davvening and bentching for granted, whereas those not accustomed to consistent observance often seem to treat davvening and bentching as more of a privilege. I'm in the "davvening-is-a-privilege" group--as a member of a shrinking congregation in which, even though we count women for a minyan, we rarely get a minyan except on Shabbat and Yom Tov mornings, I've come to treasure having the opportunity to do a full service or to chant Birkat HaMazon with a complete zimun and aloud, and am particularly unhappy when the davvening or bentching is rushed on those occasions when rushing is unnecessary.
Related: Al & Larry explain Conservative Jewish practice.
And what does this have to do with speed or spirituality? Consider the usual manner of reciting Birkat HaMazon/Grace After Meals. Judging by my own experience, the question of whether, on occasions when one is not restricted by severe time limitations, one speeds through Birkat HaMazon, reciting only the zimun ("invitation") aloud, or whether one does Birkat HaMazon b'tzibbur (as a community, aloud) seems, sometimes, to depend on whether one is Orthodox (or Orthodox-educated) or non. I've seen both Orthos and ex-Orthos speed-davven/pray their way through Birkat HaMazon. I've rarely seen non-Orthos who were not Ortho-educated do likewise.
The same is true of davvening/praying. I can understand why the pace of prayer at a "commuter" minyan is roughly 90 miles per hour--many of the attendees really do have to catch a train/bus or try to beat the rush-hour traffic to get to work on time. What I can't understand is why there's sometimes a big hurry to finish the service quickly even when people don't have to rush to work. Yes, there are considerations regarding spending time with the family, but still, can't we stop and smell the roses, or at least slow down a little, if only out of respect for Shabbat (Sabbath) or Yom Tov (holiday), or for a special occasion?
Again, it seems to me that there's an Ortho/non-Ortho divide on speed-davvening on Shabbat or Yom Tov. (There's also a push-back against speed-davvening among those Orthodox who pray with "Carlebach minyanim.")
My best guess is that speedy davvening is a product of familiarity and consistent observance. Those for whom daily davvening, bentching (saying Birkat HaMazon), and observance of the mitzvot/commandments are standard operating procedure seem, from my perspective as a relative newcomer to Jewish prayer, to take davvening and bentching for granted, whereas those not accustomed to consistent observance often seem to treat davvening and bentching as more of a privilege. I'm in the "davvening-is-a-privilege" group--as a member of a shrinking congregation in which, even though we count women for a minyan, we rarely get a minyan except on Shabbat and Yom Tov mornings, I've come to treasure having the opportunity to do a full service or to chant Birkat HaMazon with a complete zimun and aloud, and am particularly unhappy when the davvening or bentching is rushed on those occasions when rushing is unnecessary.
Related: Al & Larry explain Conservative Jewish practice.
posted by Shira Salamone at 10:22 AM
9 Comments:
I think there is also the face that Nusach Artscroll, the prevalent minhag in America, includes everything that anyone ever said in Europe. As a result, the service is really long and cumbersome, so people race through it. There is a small group that wants more spirituality, but most people, sadly, see observance as a burden to get through, not an uplifting experience.
" . . . the service is really long and cumbersome." Miami Al, I'm not sure that "Nusach ArtScroll" is entirely to blame. I would go back much farther than that, and ask how a section composed largely of psalms--namely, P'sukei D'Zimrah--became so sacred that (a) some say that it's forbidden to talk during that section and (b) even the Koren Sacks Siddur/Prayer Book lists a minimum number of text selections from that section that one is obligated to recite. Been there, blogged that--see my Morning madness—on davvening Shacharit.
"There is a small group that wants more spirituality, but most people, sadly, see observance as a burden to get through, not an uplifting experience."
My point exactly--I think that, for some, davvening and bentching are just 2 "check-offs" on the "mitzvah/commandment to-do list." :( How sad.
And, quite frankly, I know "Orthodox Jews" that let their kids turn TVs on "accidentally" on Saturdays, others who timer them, and others that simply watch movies if they aren't invited out. Others that occaisionally drive on the Sabbath if there is somewhere they have to be, I mean, it's not routine, but friends have admitted to going to a Friday night concert, parking a few blocks away when they got home, and walking from there. Doesn't make them bad people, just not fully observant.
And these people are graduates of Bais Yaakov, and RW Yeshivot, etc.
It's not black and white.
The percentage of "Serious Jews" amongst Orthodox Jews is no doubt higher than Conservative Jews, but pretending it is 100% is a total fallacy.
There are serious Orthodox, Conservative, and Reform Jews. There are non-serious Orthodox, Conservative, and Reform Jews. The non-serious Orthodox Jews probably have a more distinctly Jewish life than their more assimilated non-serious Reform/Conservative Jews, but they aren't "doing Jewish" all week long.
"The percentage of "Serious Jews" amongst Orthodox Jews is no doubt higher than Conservative Jews, but pretending it is 100% is a total fallacy."
Call me naive, but I'm still working on getting accustomed to the fact that not all people who belong to and/or attend Orthodox synagogues are completely observant.
Why? You're not a fully observant "Conservative Jew" by the book, and lots of your fellow Congregants are significantly less observant than you.
Why would it shock you that in the Orthodox world, there are people less observant than others?
Certainly, there are Jews that wake up every morning, lay Tefillin, go to Minyan, come back in the afternoon for Minyan. There are other Jews that are Orthodox because that's how they grew up, that's the Shul that they are comfortable in, they like the service, camaraderie, etc., but aren't fully observant.
Also, most of us are married, have children, etc. If a guy grew up Orthodox, married someone else that grew up Orthodox, but lost interest as an adult, does it shock you that he doesn't immediately move out of an Orthodox neighborhood, divorce his wife, and leave his kids?
I know people with custody of their kids every other weekend, they're Shomer Shabbat that weekend, and not when they don't have their kids.
We're all people, we're all Jews, we all struggle with what we want for our children, ourselves, and our marriages.
Sometimes one spouse loses interest, the other doesn't. Then life is a compromise. Maybe the interested spouse takes the kid to Shul, the other one works from their home office, plays golf, goes to the mall, or watches television, then when everyone comes back from Shul, sits down for Shabbat lunch.
There is no magic flag that being Orthodox does that makes any of life less of a struggle, though those that grew up Orthodox probably don't struggle with Hebrew the way those of us that didn't do.
I mean, do you magically disaffiliate with your Conservative Synagogue and join a Reform one because you eat hot dairy out? No, you remain who you are, a member of the Synagogue you like, and maintain your level of observance.
We're all people, we're all imperfect, and we all do what we think is best for ourselves and our families.
"Why would it shock you that in the Orthodox world, there are people less observant than others?"
Call it a leftover from my childhood. We did not live in a Jewish neighborhood, and I did not know any Orthodox Jews at all until I was in my twenties. I guess I'm still working my way out of a stereotypical view of Orthodox Jews. Rather silly, for a person of my age and more recent exposure to Orthodox Jews, I'll admit.
" . . . those that grew up Orthodox probably don't struggle with Hebrew the way those of us that didn't do."
Oy, tell me about it. Even after saying kaddish for both of my parents, I still can't davven/pray quickly enough to keep up with a typical weekday morning minyan.
"I mean, do you magically disaffiliate with your Conservative Synagogue and join a Reform one because you eat hot dairy out? No, you remain who you are, a member of the Synagogue you like, and maintain your level of observance."
Point taken.
"We're all people, we're all imperfect, and we all do what we think is best for ourselves and our families."
Well said. I'm working on doing what I think is best for me and my family. In our case, that includes trying to abide by our "mutual non-interference" agreement--see my His and hers Judaism (a mixed marriage, of sorts) post and the comments. I'm well acquainted with living in a household with mixed knowledge and observance levels.
Orthodox Jews represent 0.18% of the US population.
Never meeting one is perfectly normal.
Some friends from college had never met a Jew before college, or new one kid that lived in town for a year before moving, and Jews are around 1.9% of the US Population.
I've never met someone from Mali.
Not every American Muslims fasts on Ramadan either.
Pretty sure I can find you Indian-Americans from Hindu families that ate a hamburger at some point in their life.
I once new a Mormon girl, she never drank in Utah, she did in Connecticut.
Not everyone is 100% compliant with their religion.
Blink. Oh, the blog's still here! :) I was so busy at the office yesterday that I never even signed in.
"Orthodox Jews represent 0.18% of the US population.
Never meeting one is perfectly normal."
Just shows how long I've been living in NYC--I'm so used to being surrounded by Jews of every variety that I've forgotten what it was like out in the sticks.
On the other hand, I'm not sure that *I've* ever met anyone from Mali, either, despite having lived here for well over half of my life.
"I once [k]new a Mormon girl, she never drank in Utah, she did in Connecticut."
Sounds like me--I eat in kosher restaurants in NYC but not necessarily when out of town, where I just look for a place with a good non-meat selection.
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